Transcription
From " : A.D.Dirzwager
Subject: Vera
Date: 19 february 2025
To: Juliette Martin-Abrams
Dear Juliette,
as a caregiver for Vera, who has been diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease, I lost the time to communicate with friends. She demanded my presence all the time to fill te emptiness of her own existence. Vera has deteriorated mentally in recent months.
Normal procedure is that a judicial permission is requested to have someone admitted to a closed department, for instance of a carehome. That procedure takes at least two months. I crisis shelter, the home situation is untenable and as an emergency measure there is temporary shelter for two weeks
During those two weeks it will be decided where Vera can stay for a longer period.
I've grown accustomed to her face.
She almost makes the day begin.
I've grown accustomed to her smiles, her frowns, her ups and downs
are a second nature to me now
like breathing out and breathing in.
I've grown accustomed to her looks, accustomed to her voice
accustomed to her face.
She's second nature to me now,
like breathing out and breathing in.
I'm very grateful she's a woman and not so easy to forget
and yet
've grown accustomed to her face.and yet
accustomedto her face
(With apologies for the paraphrase of the libretto of "My fair Lady."
On february 12, 2025 at noon
Pauvre Vera was admitted in pajamas to the closed department of the 'Topaz" healthcare institution in Leiden via "the crises care procedure.' The decision whether there is a crisis care situation, has been made by the general practitioner and a scan doctor.
When we brought a suitcase with clothe lawyer Ms Daniëlle van der Hooge from Boom Advocaten in Leiden in the reception hall, who had just visited her client Vera. She was Vera's legally assigned attorney. The judge must now determine whether or not the confinement of Vera in the closed unit has led to deprivation of liberty. She was very impressed by the Vera'a file and the difficult period we went through. I, the 84 old husband, could no longer physically cope with Vera's mental decline.
After 55 years of being together, today marks the beginning of our separated lives, as I stay in our apartment in a melancholic mood.
The next morning, February 13, we were told that Vera had adapted quickly to her new environment.
She has showered and her hair has been washed.
On Friday morning, February 14, we received a phone call that Vera's stay yesterday was uneventful. In the afternoon ±3.30 pm Natasja (wife of Reinoud) and I (ADD) visited her for the first time in her new home in Leiden. When we arrived we were greeted emotionally, but shortly afterwards Vera gave the impression of acceptance of her new surroundings.
I have the impression that Vera has been taken care of in a good place and is receiving the care that I was no longer able to give her. With Vera's departure from our Biezenland 99 apartment, a new phase has begun in my life. It will take some time for me to get used to it, after being married to her for 55 years, Adriaan
