Name/Title
AU Harris, Joseph Hastings - 1897-08-01 letter to Bertha Elizabeth LambertEntry/Object ID
1990.1.146Context
[Box 219, Athens, OH, to Miss Bertha E. Lambert, Westerville, Ohio, “Franklin Co.”]
Box 219 Athens, O.
Aug. 1, 1897
Miss Bertha Lambert
Westerville, Ohio.
My Darling Bertha: Here I am in my room at hotel with wash stand as desk. Frank is working for Carlos here now. He and I just came from S.S. but will not attend the morning service, so I shall spend the time with you although you are sitting in the choir.
I got one of your letters from Plantsville last evening written July 23. I don't blame you for being anxious and I did not think of there being such a long delay as there was and will write more frequently if it is only a note.
I shall return to Chauncey tomorrow again, but do not know how long I will be there. I suppose I will get my expenses out of it perhaps which of course is better than being idle only it gives no chance for study.
I expect to go to work in earnest by the middle of the wk although my finger is very tender yet.
The work will be on the City Hall here. If I don't get too lazy I shall do some work on my diary today. There is only one line of thought that I think I should care to write down or recollect and that is my relation to you. That grows sweeter and deeper no difference what else may come. I do not wish to act childish or simple, but I don't see any way to avoid it so long as we sustain the relation we do and I have no notion of breaking off our engagement even if we have to wait ten yrs.
If I can get work what would you think of my staying with my work until we are able to carry out our plans?
As it stands now I see only one way in which I can be in school and that is to get means from the church and as I am not an annual conf. minister nor could become so this fall I presume that would shut me out. If your eyes will permit I want you to go ahead sure. I do not know what they will allow you, but if possible secure enough to make you comfortable in every way and get your clothes.
It is difficult to say what may develop in the next five wks. God has His own plans and can work wonderfully if we but listen and wait.
Of course I have said more than I ought, but have not meant to be rebellious, although I cannot see the bright side just as you seem to.
I can bear financial embarrassments etc. much better than some other embarrassments, which in some way seem to make up a part of my life, but I leave these things until we meet for a long talk.
They expect to have the college finished by Jan. 1, '98 and it surely will be a nice building. The streets are being paved so they have things in pretty good shape, but I don't like the disposition of the people here like some other places, but of course I can't have my way about everything.
Yes I have no doubt your trip to Geneva was a great thing for you and what is good for you is good for me and I expect to derive much help from it. I believe we will get to go to the field and sometimes I wish we might go this fall, but perhaps it is best not to do so. I prefer further preparation if possible but somehow it seems I have gone my limit until I get a start and if I teach I would rather go where I am needed more than here.
Your life certainly is sweet to me and I can make most any kind of sacrifice now in order to bring about plans to bring our lives together. I cannot be my true self without you and I do not think it is simply selfish motives that prompts me but it is the soul craving its counterpart. Night before last I dreamed that I saw you at a little distance and on extending my arms you rushed into them just as a child and of course I did not shove you away at all nor forget the rest of the program. I suppose I will have work for a while now and of course must stay with it, but will come to you the first opportunity and shall not be bashful in greeting you.
Your letters are ever so good and helpful to me. It has been such a task to write with my finger, but will try to write often.
You know there is so much to say and so many things we would like to tell each other that a letter seems almost like mockery and yet how nice it is to get a letter. I cannot refrain kissing every one of them.
You certainly are a dear, patient, sweet little girl and have put so much sunshine into my life. I am more or less discontent with my own life, but am perfectly satisfied with your life in every particular.
I will try to be more cheerful and trustful. Your letters of cheer shame me with my ingratitude; instead of being a support and shield to you I am a hindrance in many ways, but I love you dearly and shall cling to you with all my heart. This training may be just what we need. I trust you may be free to express yourself as to what you think best to do in our work and what your choice may be in reference to our school work, etc.
How I would like to spend this P.M. with you. I am quite well and sleep much better than I did. Whatever may come we are still one until death and should you be called first we will continue to be one. May God guard and keep my sweetheart. Take times just as easy as you can on account of your eyes. I sent a note from Chauncey yesterday A.M. Please continue to write often.
Kind regards to all who may inquire, Your Lover,
J. H. Harris.
Aug 2. Good morning “Dear,” J. H. H.
